We have 4-5 boys like this: they disrupt classes, bring teachers to tears, and trash the classroom.…

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We have 4-5 boys like this: they disrupt classes, bring teachers to tears, and trash the classroom. The parents are in denial and don't react, only defending their children. There was a meeting, naturally, they weren't there. Teachers called for a prevention council meeting, parents didn't show up for that either. They refused the PMPK (Psychological, Medical, and Pedagogical Commission). In the future, they'll be on the juvenile delinquency list; two are already there, but it didn't help. Parents are panicking that our teacher will leave, as the teacher from the parallel class did leave, and they still feel no one cares about them. It's a mess. Neighboring schools are overcrowded. Yesterday, I subtly hinted that it's time for the school psychologist to work with these children, as the daily drama interferes with other students' learning, plus the teacher, who was driven to hysterics, then yells at everyone because she can't control herself anymore. But our school psychologist only handles corrective therapy, and it's clear that work will only happen if the parents of those children file requests. The other parents just gossip, saying they don't discipline their kids and that's that. Everyone's stuck in this situation... What other options can you think of?
The doctor ordered an EKG. If everything is okay there, we'll try taking a neuroleptic and Attarax t…
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Tanya
How is the school administration reacting?
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Yuliya
The teacher didn't suggest it, but parents proposed signing a permission slip to allow parents to attend classes and sit with their children. Translation isn't being considered at all.
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Tanya Chamkaeva
To have them registered with the child protection services, they need applications submitted to the director, registered by the secretary. We had collective ones, and I wrote so many times. I wrote everywhere, even reaching Moscow. Without success. I wasted a year on this, all the way to court.
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Yuliya
Tanya Our principal is just for show; the vice principal makes the real decisions. The teacher said yesterday that he won't deal with these issues right now, and if we report the school, she'll get in trouble again.
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Yuliya
Tanya Chamkaeva And what? Did the kids stay in class?
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Tanya Chamkaeva
Tanya Chamkaeva Yes, they didn't even put me on the child protection register. But the situation there was even tougher than yours. We transferred to another school
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Yuliya
The children aren't really out of control, only two are truly inadequate. The others just don't have a connection with the teacher. They need to work on that, but there's no prospect of that happening, not even a glimmer.
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Yuliya
It would be better to leave, as even these children's parents don't want to transfer them because things are even worse at the neighboring school, where the kids are completely out of control. Another school has no teachers, so lessons are also taught by whoever is available. And against this backdrop, ours is the lesser of evils, and our class is also the most "reasonable" in the entire grade level.
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Yuliya
The teacher doesn't want to consider the option with the parents, even though we suggested it.
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Natalya
This is the main thing, but I don't know, maybe I should switch to another district. I took mine to school like this for almost 2 years, traveling 30 meters, because anything closer wasn't an option.
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Mariya
I understand you perfectly. Write a collective statement from the parents to the director.
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Yuliya
Yes, if we consider another district, but I won't be able to drive her there. I don't have a car, and I won't have one in the future because I had a traumatic experience while driving, and I won't get behind the wheel again. Plus, my daughter gets nauseous, she feels sick and vomits from car rides in the morning. We need something within walking distance.
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Alisa Selezneva
😬 Awkward situation
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Yuliya
They also need help that our school can't provide. They always find excuses because these families have other children who are typical, so it's unlikely that parenting issues are something doctors need to deal with. But no one wants to get involved. Everyone's attitude is 'let them leave,' but at the same time, no one wants to sign any papers. They're just wasting time talking about how this is unacceptable and how people have lost all respect. But I can't go against these moms and their kids alone. My daughter already has a difficult relationship with the children, and they'll start picking on her.
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Natalya
I understand, my eldest is the same, but we ended up switching to formula. However, I wouldn't switch before 6th grade, definitely not before 8th. As for driving, I'm a worrier myself, I was constantly anxious about how everyone parks so close in the courtyard. In the end, I actually bumped a car there. After that, I thought I wouldn't drive into the courtyard anymore and would just park outside the gates. But it's okay, I still drive in 🙈
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Yuliya
My period has passed, I should have started right away, but now I can't even imagine it, I feel like a passenger in constant panic.
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Yuliya
Yes, parents asked about the director about 5 times, she avoids the topic. We say we'll sign everything collectively, but she immediately dodges. Because she has her own screw-ups there too, and she'll get in serious trouble for it. I don't understand her in these moments either, but these are 'her quirks', you can't change her now.
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Natalya
Is there an option to practice?
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Yuliya
No, you only need to bring the instructor, but I'm not considering buying a car because I don't really have anywhere to drive.
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Natalya
Oh, I thought it was a car, then the question is withdrawn.
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Alisa Selezneva
We can't leave this situation as it is, we need to move forward.
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Yuliya
The problem is more teacher-student. She wants well-behaved, "silky" children, and these kids will never be like that, she can't handle it. I think these situations are trivial, like breaking a chair, dirtying a desk, tearing a curtain, and she yells and scolds for it for half the lesson. The child talks back, and it all escalates. (My approach: call the parents to fix it with the child.) But the teacher makes a tragedy out of it as if they'd killed someone. Boys fight amongst themselves. But parents sort these situations out themselves. Specifically, if someone hurt my daughter, I find out from the teacher what happened, and then I write/call/meet with the parent. So far, my daughter hasn't complained this year. Well, they make up, they're all in it together.
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Lena
They see and know. Measures 0. And these children haven't been like this since yesterday, but since 1st grade.
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Yuliya
The teacher will never set up a camera because she behaves incorrectly at such moments and doesn't want to admit it.
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Yuliya
Tanya Chamkaeva Our director won't do anything, he was "sent" from above and isn't here to solve the school's problems, but just to be here. Unfortunately, the director who truly cared about the school's future died of COVID.
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Yana
It's not up to the teacher to decide whether to install cameras or not. Surgeons operate under cameras, and a teacher's personal preferences won't override this. Tell her and the deputy principal that the parents insist on the cameras as a parental initiative to ensure order in the classroom and enhanced security measures according to the Russian Federation's legislation.
What does the parent committee say? They are the ones who should be discussing such matters with the administration. I'm telling you this as a member of the parent committee.
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Yuliya
The parent committee suggested options, and the parents were in agreement: 1) talk to the principal (the teacher won't), 2) let the parents sit with their own children for order (nowhere to do it), 3) well, while the situation with the prevention council and PDN is being developed (but it's the teacher herself), we're waiting for results. 4) The proposal to transfer the children, like someone from the parents wants and is looking for options. And I suggested that since nothing is being resolved now and it will take time, and the problem exists and everyone is suffering, then let the school and psychologist work with them at least. (but no one to do it) Most of the parents just sighed and said 'ah'.
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