Honestly, I don't know where to start. I'm tired. Not physically, but mentally. I'm just exhausted,…

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Honestly, I don't know where to start. I'm tired. Not physically, but mentally. I'm just exhausted, I've hit rock bottom. My daughter is two years old, and since birth, she's had terrible sleep. She'd wake up every 30 minutes while breastfeeding and cling to me. The moment I'd take her off, she'd cry, and it was a cycle. All the doctors insisted it was because of breastfeeding: "Wean her, and she'll start sleeping." She's been weaned for almost a month now, but her sleep hasn't improved. She only falls asleep at night in my arms while I rock her. During the day, she sometimes naps in her crib. But sometimes, she has a meltdown. As soon as it's time to sleep, she screams her head off, "I don't want to sleep." No amount of coaxing works at all. I've been snapping more and more often. Sometimes I yell so much I don't recognize myself. I know I shouldn't, but in the moment, such anger washes over me that I want to hit someone. Of course, I don't hit my children and never will, but I'm starting to get scared for myself. I feel like I have no strength left. Absolutely none. I can't rely on grandmothers for help – one lives in the village and works, the other is 70 years old. I have no idea how to cope or how to help myself. And please, don't judge if this doesn't resonate with you – just move along.
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Yuliya
Leave the kids with my husband for the weekend and go out by myself, anywhere, just to have some "me time" and recharge.
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Natali
I used to hire a nanny for two hours so I could just walk around wherever and whenever I wanted, because the kids were so attached to me. Now they're older and the boys want to spend more time with their dad.
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inga
Does your husband have the weekend off? Talk to him and lay it on the line. You need one day a week to spend however and wherever you want.
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Anna
Kids grow up.
Mine started sleeping after 3 years old
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prosto LYuDOK
A nanny for a few hours a day? Does your child go to daycare? If not, consider enrolling them.
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Viktoriya
Send them to kindergarten. It's good for you and the child, plus they get a routine and extra development.
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Mariya
So over 2 years, she got used to falling asleep on the breast and in arms.
What to do? Endure and retrain.
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Yuliya
You're still rocking your baby to sleep? You should have stopped that a while ago. You also rock them on a yoga ball. They probably cry at night because they get overstimulated during the day.
Honestly, the situation sounds familiar, but yours isn't too bad. Your baby sleeps during the day and at night, they just have trouble settling down. Try to stop rocking them to sleep and create new bedtime rituals.
My baby wouldn't sleep at all during the day, so I spent all day trying to get them to nap. I rocked them in my arms until they were a year old. My arms became like a monkey's, and I even injured my toe on my foot from it – I couldn't feel it at all, and my sensitivity still hasn't fully returned, by the way. I started weaning them from being held at 11 months, and it took almost until they were two years old because my daughter also got overstimulated quickly and needed rocking and soothing.
Your baby's daytime activity and evening routine have a big impact. After naps, you need to let them burn off energy outside, and a couple of hours before bed, dim the lights, have quiet, calm conversations, and avoid any active games. Maybe you need to adjust the bedtime routine, starting a little earlier, before they reach their peak tiredness. Observe your baby – maybe an hour before bed they start rubbing their ears or showing the first signs of fussiness.

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Olga
Yuliya Thanks for your opinion. I only rock her to sleep at night, when she wakes up and can't fall back asleep. Sometimes I think it's because of a bad dream. During the day, I usually put her in her crib and wait for the tantrum to pass so she can fall asleep. I know I need to break this habit
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Olga
Mariya Thanks for your opinion 🌹
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Elena
All kids are different. Both of my sons would start having tantrums before their afternoon nap around 2 years old. I struggled with it for about two weeks and then just stopped doing it. But they went to bed earlier. My daughter puts herself to bed, she'll be 3 in February. But not always at the same time. And my boys slept better than my daughter. She can still wake up at night and cry if she overdid it during the day. So I try to stick to a routine. I finished breastfeeding at 1.2 years old. So it's not about that, it's about the child.
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Olga
Viktoriya Tomorrow is our first day of kindergarten, and I'm worried that because of her bad sleep, she'll have a hard time waking up and adjusting.
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Olga
prosto LYuDOK We don't have a nanny at all. We're going to daycare for the first time tomorrow
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prosto LYuDOK
prosto LYuDOK And just like that, after a month of adjusting, you can finally rest easy in the mornings.
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Olga
Anna I also remember my older child only started sleeping normally after 3 years old. I was hoping it would be different with my daughter)
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Olga
inga It happens, but very, very rarely. He helps as much as he can
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Olga
Yuliya I've already talked to my husband about this. As soon as he has a day off, we'll do it. The problem is, he rarely gets days off, and both of us want to rest.
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Olga
Elena I'm afraid of not putting my baby down for a daytime nap, I worry that the night sleep will be completely ruined from overtiredness
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Olga
Yuliya She hasn't taken a pacifier since birth. Neither a pacifier nor a bottle. If she starts to cry really hard, of course I pick her up and comfort her (if she lets me).
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Olga
prosto LYuDOK That's the plan! Thanks
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Elena
Elena She just fell asleep at 3 PM and will sleep until 5 or 6 PM. Lights out for everyone at 10 PM. You really have to watch your baby. You can tell when kids are tired. I also got her used to falling asleep without rocking by placing her on my stomach and gently rocking myself. Now, I just tell her it's time to rest and lie down. She grabs two pillows, or I give them to her – she rests her head on one and covers herself with the other))) Anyway, we have our own little quirks. But she falls asleep on her own without any fuss. She's also been going to daycare for a year now.
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Olga
Elena And what is the baby's age?
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